Keepin' it real folks.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

And so it begins.

I've been wanting to start a new blog for a while now...for a variety of reasons...that I won't bore you with...just know that I'll only be importing a few of my previous blog's posts, and that blog will soon go private.

If you're 'new' to my blog, then clickity click on the 'about me' to the right to get the low down.

It's a slow but steady process on the other links, but it will all come together soon!

So, here we have it. 

The new blog.

Fascinating so far, huh?!?!

Well, let's get right into it.

So one of my goals on this new blog is to 'keep it real'.  Tell it like it is.  Thread the needle.  Toll the line.

Alright ,you get it.

So here's my keepin' it real for today...

I am super proud to be Korean.   

But it hasn't always been that way.

I was bullied as a kid, semi-popular as a teenager, and I would say that I'm a pretty secure adult now.

I remember flipping through magazines in junior high and dog earring the pages of the girls I'd like to look like. 

They were all white.

Just like my family. (except for my one of sisters, who is also adopted)

And 98% of my friends.

Maybe it was just that phase of a typical teenage girl wanting to look like something other than herself.

Maybe it was because it might have been easier to just look like everyone around me.

In high school, there were two other Asian kids in my grade. 


When we decided to adopt, it was like the Korean in me slapped me across the face.

Yes, I knew I was Korean.

But I wasn't sure I ever felt Korean, or if I actually wanted to be Korean.

Suddenly, I wanted it all...the language, the culture, the food...

I was proud to be Korean! 

In the 3 1/2 years since, I've done nothing but fill that hunger.

Pun intended, as I also discovered me some Korean food and I like what I found people!

Before that, the only other encounter with Korean food I recall was when a Korean neighbor we had in Germany used to make us kimbap. I never ate any.  Not even sure I knew it was Korean food at the time or if it was intended for me and my sister or not.

Don't get me wrong, our family is quite cultured. 

I lived in Korea till I was two, Germany till I was 11 and traveled all over Europe while there.  Amongst other places, we've camped in Switzerland, sat on the beaches of Italy and even took a family vacation to Israel.

But the connection I feel and the desire I have towards Korea and it's culture is very different.

However, when we were in process to adopt Seon-Mi , I actually filled out the paperwork to have her escorted home.

I was afraid. 
I wasn't sure I'd be accepted.
I was scared things wouldn't turn out quite like I'd hoped.

But after much thought and prayer, and some advice from fellow adoptive parents, I knew going to Korea to pick up Seon-Mi would be an opportunity of a lifetime.

I traveled alone, and loved every single second of it.

(Well, besides the plane ride home, but that's another story for another day!)

I felt like I belonged.

Totally got lost in the crowd.

Everyone looked

I was home.

I've decided that home doesn't always have to be where you live, but instead can be a place where you feel comfortable, loved, and connected to.

Now, in my quest to define the Korean part of my Korean-American status, I've also become a fan of Korean pop stars.

Namely, the Wonder Girls.

I think these girls are some of the most beautiful women I have ever seen.

(and let's not also forget about their freaking incredible dance moves, which I plan to learn in their entirety from THIS video!)

And if I saw them in a magazine , I just might dog ear their page...

I am proud to look like them!!

Well, okay, not exactly like them, (as long as we're keepin' it real!) but you get the idea.

I just hope that my beautiful Korean girls will find their place as Korean-Americans as well.

As a mom to one Korean daughter, and a soon to be mom to another, I hope I can be an example to them.

I can say that everyone in our family knows several Korean words, eats lots of Korean foods, knows a little Korean culture, celebrates a few Korean holidays and Seon-Mi responds with ease to both her Korean and American name and my half Korean son is very proud of that one half.

In conversation with Seon-Mi the other day...

Me: Where are you from?
SM: Korea!
Me: Where is Hui-a from?
SM: Korea!
Me: Where is mommy from:
SM: Korea!
Me: Where is brother from?
SM: No where!
Me: Hmmm, okay, where is daddy from?
SM: No where!
Me: Alrighty then.

So maybe, just maybe, we need to also focus on the American part.

3 comments: said...

I was aways jealous of the Korean hair in the family. I even once tried dying mine black once, but instead of shiny black hair, I got dingy black hair and looked angry and mean for a while.

Helena said...

LOL! "Nowhere!" Too cute.

Dawnb said...

Awww Kim, I always thought you were beautiful and you never seemed out of place to me! Afterall you were an awesome cheerleader for me to mimic as the buffalo!

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